Student Loans

Bear with me while I rant for awhile. I just graduated college and have been unable to find a job. Either no one calls back or I am not expereinced enough. Because of that I haven't been able to pay my student loans. No matter how many times i call them I can never get a hold of an actual person, and no matter how many times I email saying I have no job, they think I have money to pay for it. I recently got a letter saying I now ow 1000 dollars for the next three months. Now they know I am unemployeed how do they expect me to pay that much?? And in order to forebare the loans I need to pay $150 that of course I don't have.

Now I'm going back to school, so I have no idea if I will be able to get another loan for the next couple of years or so. So I'm in the process of looking for scholarships which make it rather hard because I hardly qualify for the bulk of them....I didn't think college was supposed to cause this much stress. Wish me luck as I continue in my efforts....

lifeness

So I was thinking today and I decided, I'm not happy where I am in life. I mean...there are certain aspects of my life that I could not live without such as my friends. But I dont want to be here...meaning I don't want to be in Pa anymore yet at the same time there are people I can't imagine leaving and the fact that I can't move somewhere where I don't know anyone...I hate being alone for many reasons. I hate being dependant on other people (and yes for those who know I am workin on getting my license). I being in the same place day in and day out is driving me in sane. I go no where except this house and this small town.

I think critical thinking/analysis is like my dream job, yet at the same time where would I work? I mean I would like teaching, but at the high school or college age, but at the same time would I be the kind of teacher that gets locked in the closest (yes that has happened at Bentworth)...

I think it all boils down to that same questions that haunts my thoughts....where do I belong, what's my worth to employers...and I honestly don't know the answer.....marketing myself better...hmm how to do that when I have virtually no skills and pretty much scared to death of being around masses of people. I can read and write...there are my skills. WHOOPY-WEE